just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
cat food counts as protein by the way
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
