let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I need moral support for this bender
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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