You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
