I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
