Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
