I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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