I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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