I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
