Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Randomize
