Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
