he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I enjoy the company of your penis
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
