Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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