You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
