someone owes me an orgasm
you win again, gameday.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize