Can i not drive my cunt home
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Randomize
