Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Randomize
