drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize