apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Randomize
