dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
