I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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