Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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