weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
PANTIES FOUND
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
