Your tits are I can't wait for
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
