Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
