covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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