I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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