i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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