I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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