One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
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