we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Two words: blizzard sex
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
