Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
