Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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