Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Randomize
