i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Randomize
