just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Randomize
