He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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