I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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