Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
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