Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
