what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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