Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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