no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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