I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
