I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
