You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
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