I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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