I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize