And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
you mean i was at the winter classic?
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
A bitchslap is in order.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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