quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
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