Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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